WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!?!?

So I haven't posted for a variety of reasons, number one being that my mother is slowly driving me crazy. She heard this rumour from a friend of a friend of ... you get the idea, that the restaurant where I'm having my wedding is going bankrupt. She heard this rumour the DAY AFTER WE MAILED THE INVITATIONS so you can imagine the panic this generated. In her, that is, not me. I'm a little skeptical, being that this is a very successful restaurant. Also, google was silent on the topic, and if google doesn't know about it, it's not true.

my mom: "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!?!??!"
me: "mom, I don't think it's true. I mean really, a friend of a friend of a friend? what are the chances of that being even remotely accurate?"
my mom [almost hysterical at this point]: "SHE READ IT IN THE PAPER!!!!! WHAT WILL WE DO!??!?!?"
me: "mom, it's not like there's only one place that hosts weddings in calgary."
my mom: "WE PUT DOWN A DEPOSIT!!!"
my dad [who had up to this point been much more concerned about the hockey draft cancellation than what is, according to my mother, the complete doom of my wedding]: "WE DID?!?!?!?! HOW MUCH?!?!?!?"
my mom: "I DON'T REMEMBER!!!!!
my dad: "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?!?!?!?!"
me: "please tell me that this behaviour is not genetic."

The result of all this is that I had to email the restaurant to ask if it was true that they were going bankrupt. My mom wanted me to phone them like RIGHT NOW but I figured it was more polite to ask a place of business, "excuse me, are you by any chance going under?" by email. geez, like what is the etiquette for that one? It's not exactly covered by the book my grandma gave me, y'know?

This is merely one in a long string of things my mother has found to obsess over in relation to the wedding. Her dress has [thank goodness] kept her busy for the last three weeks, but now that she has found a dress [which I had to look at like six times before she would buy it - I haven't even seen my dress yet] she has turned her obssesive powers of retirement to, for whatever reason, flowers. More specifically, vases. Don't ask me why. There is no reason to the madness. This is an improvement, however, over her obsession with [i kid you not] my shoes, and prior to that, with whether or not I was going to wear a veil. [I am, I'll have you know, because if I didn't, I think her head would explode]

And my mother is not alone in her wedding obsessions. My best friend, who is getting married a month and a half after me, reports that her mom is obsessed with, of all things, cake toppers. Her mom woke her up one morning because she had to know, RIGHT THEN, only EIGHT MONTHS BEFORE THE WEDDING, before cake had even been thought about, WHAT WAS SHE GOING TO DO ABOUT A CAKE TOPPER?!?!?!?! And, to make things worse, these two women have been conversing by telephone. Regularly. I foresee the following conversation:

me: "Hi mom, just calling to let you know that the bankruptcy rumour is total baloney. The wedding is a go."
my mom: "That's great honey....BUT WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT A CAKE TOPPER?!?!?!?!?!?"
my dad: "SHE DOESN"T HAVE A CAKE TOPPER?!?!?! HAVEN'T WE PUT DOWN A DEPOSIT ON THAT YET?!?!?!"


[sigh] and I begin to understand why elopement is so popular.